tactile hostile

'why do people tell lies, half-truths, white lies, non-revelations'
'Maybe they're afraid to reveal them, cause it might change people's perception of them. Something they're embarrased about'

been a grappling point to the point i realise its not healthy and possibly affecting relationships with people around me. probably a skeleton in my closet, which i tot I had shipped out long ago. trying not to think much of it, but i need to be able to trust. in a way, the above behaviour is akin to cheating on a certain level no? but the assumption therein lies in the extent of expectations and nature of all the type of "ships" we have with people. if that is so, then i should cease to expect anything to save being on the receiving end of the above and potential bruise. yes,that should be it.

when i trust people, naturally you let them in, and by logic you will be vulnerable.
i m naive, i agree but thats cos i think the best of a person. so these days maybe im more fearful of opening up, of being vulnerable, of potential bruises. Cos i know that when i do trust, i will give it my all. An imbalanced tipping scale, which i don't want to be on. But some how I know deep down i still will. so this attitude has to change plus changing the goalposts of expectations.

disappointment is as long as its name. Yet there's still an end after T. i can choose to wait for the end or choose to refuse feeling crushed anymore.
setbacks only make you stronger, even if they repeat themselves. the latter it is.